Six month check-up

It's been almost six months exactly since we left Malaysia and moved to Australia. Before we left I did a blog post on the things that I would miss and the things that I would not. Turns out, that list was pretty much spot on. But here are a few things I overlooked:

Winter isn't so bad 

 

So I've done (more than) my fair share of complaining about the mild Australian winter, but I did overlook an upside. Winter cooking. A nice steak and ale pie just doesn't taste as good when it is hot outside. Fact.

I can haz warms 

 

On another wintry note, the cat loves us so much more when it's cold outside. Yes, we know she is just using us for our warms, we don't care. Back in the tropics, she her meows could roughly be translated as 'oi, geroff me.'

Clean and cold tap water is a real luxury. 

Just because the tap water in Kuala Lumpur won't kill you, that doesn't mean you want to drink it. After a big storm our taps would often run brown sludge. We even had to put a filter on our washing machine so our clothes didn't come out dirtier than they went in. Sydney water is awesome.

These boots were made for walkin'

 

Walking places. In KL to walk anywhere was to take your life into your hands, whether it was the open six-foot deep storm drains, broken and dilapidated sidewalks, piles of mystery rubble and garbage, drivers using pedestrians for target practice or all of the above. Sydney is a pedestrian dream. Well maintained bike and walking paths, functioning intersections, and drivers that give pedestrians the right-of-way. In Sydney, the biggest hazard is show-off fitness-buffs mowing down packs of tourists and small children jogging in Circular Quay.

Learning the lingo

Just because they officially speak English in Australia does not mean I understand everything that is said. Some Aussie accents are more impenetrable than a soused Scotsman at Hogmanay.  Throw in some of their bonkers slang to boot and I am at a complete, utter loss.  In Malaysia, as long as you understood 'can' and 'cannot' you could go far.

 Parking

We went to IKEA last weekend. IKEA is exactly the same every where in the world, a full-fledged, bonafide, three-ring circus. As we circled the parking garage like vultures I did fleetingly think, 'if we were in Malaysia, we could just abandon the car anywhere and get away with it.' Then I came to my senses.

Getting the same answer every time. 

 

When I was working through the final details of getting the cat admitted into Australia, I had to ring up the Department of Agriculture, Forestry and Fisheries as well as the Quarantine Centre a few times. When I did, something magical happened: if I asked both departments the same question, I received the same answer. Every. Single. Time. The answer didn't change depending upon who picked up the phone, or what day of the week it was or if there was a full moon. There was a single, correct answer - not four conflicting ones, each with kernel of truth.

The movers are coming!

The end is getting awfully near. Yesterday was our last ófficial' day at work. One week today we are on a plane with one-way tickets to Sydney.

Tomorrow the movers will come and pack up all of our things - many of them amazing things that will make the journey to Sydney and remind us of what an awesome adventure we've had here - Javanese masks, Chinese porcelain lamps, a Dayak statue from Borneo, art from Vietnam and Thailand and so much more.

I was just looking back and re-reading my early posts on this blog, reliving the excitement and anticipation of when we came to Malaysia 3 years and 3 months ago - the first geko in the house, our first encounters with Asian driving, the fabulous food. It was terrific.

We are ready for something new but I'm pleased that after 9 years and counting of living abroad the excitement hasn't completely worn off. (I'm also still very aware of what a privilege it is to live abroad as we have, and how very different it is from simply travelling to places).

To live in Sydney will be a whole new kind of adventure - less exotic, and a known quantity, but that is what we are now ready for. We're ready for a place where we feel we 'belong' (Malaysia has been very good to us, but it would take many, many more years for it to truly feel like home.) For a wandering British/American couple, Australia is perhaps our ultimate half-way house.

The good, the bad and the ugly.

2 posts in under a week! I'm really hoping to get this blog back on track for awhile. I've been pretty lousy at it lately, but we had a huge summer (literally, we both came back from a three-week trip to America significantly heavier than when we left) and then the start of the academic year was upon us and so it goes.

Anyway, as our time in Malaysia grows shorter (61 days!) I'm starting to see everything in two categories: what I will miss, and what I will not. Let's take a look:

Things I will miss:

The lovely, lovely weather. 90 degrees every day, guaranteed.

The food. In no particular order: yam basket, banana leaf curry, laksas of all sorts, hokkien mee, steamboat, Chinese pork ribs, salted chilies, the list goes on . . . .

Cheap stuff. Especially: food, haircuts, the vet, gasoline, (really nice) hotels, taxis, the cinema, massages.

Regional travel. So much to see and do, in three years we have covered: Cambodia, Laos, Vietnam, India, Myanmar, Singapore, Indonesia x 2, Thailand x 4 and several good romps around Malaysia including a few trips to Borneo and some totally gorgeous islands.

Cheap regional airfare. Or how else would we have managed the above? AirAsia, I love you.

Under the sea. This part of the world has possibly made snorkeling my new favourite activity. Rays, octopus, starfish, clownfish, amazing corals. Can't get that just anywhere.

Wildlife. Orangutans, elephants, proboscis monkeys, hornbills, giant lizards, sea turtles. Even the little geckos.

Having a swimming pool. There is a very nice pool about 20 feet from my front door.

Thunderstorms. Totally epic, torrential, noisy, tropical thunderstorms.

Never ever being cold. You know what it's like to get out of bed at 7am in January in Illinois? I don't.

About a billion public holidays. When you observe Muslim, Christian, Buddhist, Hindu and national/state holidays that adds up to a lot.

The diversity. There's a lot of different people here. I like that.

*And this really goes without saying, but of course all of our amazing Malaysian and fellow expat friends who we've met along the way.

Things I will not miss:

Driving. Everything about it.

Trying to get stuff done. It's so hard to get the simplest things done here sometimes. Want to pay your internet bill? Must call them up and do it over the phone (Oh! The irony). Need a plumber? Take three consecutive days off work and pray he shows up by the third day. Want to deposit a cheque? Good luck finding the 'special' deposit machine for foreigners.

Calling strangers on their mobile. See above. Lots of businesses and tradesmen are not online, so you can't look them up online or book an appointment. Instead, you ask around, you get some guy's mobile number and hope for the best.

Bureaucracy. There is a form and a supplementary price for everything.

Negotiating. I hate haggling and negotiating, I don't want to be ripped off and I don't want to rip you off. Just tell me the real (fair) price.

Sugar. It's in everything.

Spitting, hawking, chewing, slurping. I know it's a cultural thing, but I don't like it.

Littering. Is there really no space in your car for that empty packet of crisps? Really?

Cockroaches. Really big ones.

Lack of personal space. The pushing, shoving, me-first battle of boarding a plane, train or just standing in what passes for queue here.

No means no. If I said I don't want to buy it, I really mean it. Also, don't follow me around the store.

Palm oil plantations. Please, please stop destroying your beautiful country.

Sopping wet toilets. With or without footprints on the seat, this really irritates me. If part of your bathroom ritual basically involves taking a shower, that's fine. Just please wipe up the mess.

And did I mention DRIVING?

Southbound and down (under)

Well our great Southeast Asian adventure will shortly be drawing to a close (and this blog will need a new name). We will be embarking on an entirely new adventure to Australia. Yes, we are moving to Sydney.

We're excited. Australia is a nice place. A really nice place. For the third year in a row, Sydney, Adelaide, Perth, and Melbourne have all made the cut for the 10 best cities to live - worldwide.  We love Australia. We got engaged in Australia and it's really the perfect halfway house for an American/British couple. It has the space, friendliness and can-do attitude of the US combined with British common sense and a genuine sense of fair-play. Also, Rupert Murdoch no longer lives there.

Australia is also expensive. Food is particularly expensive. You're thinking, how bad can it be, right? Well let's take for example, one of the most essential products on earth, a 24 pack of decent beer (say, Goose Island equivalent) that will set you back a whopping AUD$72 (that's USD$68!!!) A lime, a single lime - not a pack or a bag of limes, but a single lime? AUD 1.75 (USD1.65).

Fortunately, like other expensive places (Scandinavia, Switzerland) the salaries just about make that a fathomable expense.

Anyway as I said, we're excited. After a brief bout of nostalgia on leaving Malaysia (and Asia generally) I also very much feel like it's time to go.  We've been here just over three years now and I think that's a pretty good run. As our time here grows shorter I also find that I'm quickly losing patience and tolerance for all of the little inefficiencies and hassles that were quaint and 'all part of the experience' in the early days of our arrival. Now, I just really want a dishwasher and the ease of paying my internet bill online.

But before we go we've got one more tropical Thanksgiving and Christmas to get through, one more jaunt to Thailand and lots of catching up to do on this blog. Departure day is January 24th.

The best of Southeast Asia, so far.

We are mere weeks away from having been here for 2.5 years. This quarter decade anniversary has prompted to me look back and think about all the amazing things we've seen, done - and eaten since our arrival here. This list is perhaps a bit pre-mature, we've seen but a tiny sliver of what this part of the world has to offer - and we haven't even been to Vietnam or Sri Lanka yet - and we've barely scratched the surface of huge countries like Indonesia (although we are adding another drop in that bucket in about two weeks time).

So, I'm going to look back at some of the best stuff we've done over the last 2.5 years.  I am excluding India from this exercise partly because India is not technically part of Southeast Asia - but mostly because India just overwhelms everything - it is a category unto itself.  Obviously these opinions are my own, but I'd love to hear alternative suggestions and thoughts from those who have done similar and different excursions in the region. Here's a few of the 'best of's' I've decided to look at:

• Best food
• Best beer
• Best beaches
• Best scenery
• Best temples
• Best wildlife
• Best city
• Best markets
• Best museum

I'm going to start with a couple of the easier ones in the hope that maybe we'll have completed our next Indonesian adventure before I pass judgement on a few things!

Anyway, let's get started:

Best beer: Beer Lao - no doubt about it. This beer, with good reason, is the pride and joy of Laos.  It lacks the high sugar content (as well as accompanying hangover associated with other Asian beers - I'm thinking Tiger and Kingfisher) and is reminiscent of a quality Eastern European pilsner - which isn't surprising considering Beer Lao started out as a joint-venture between the government of Laos and Czech brewers. Beer Lao isn't nearly as available outside of Laos as it should be (although I've now spotted it in Thailand and Myanmar) but if it does pop up at your local liquor store make sure you try it.

Best food: This is extremely difficult - and easy.  Cambodia and Myanmar both did their level best to kill me, they are not in the running.  Despite a genuine love for Javanese bakso and tempe goreng, Indonesia barely ranks.  I had a genuinely delicious $7 steak in Laos, but again, not enough to earn to the top spot. Perhaps rather predictably, this is a dead heat between Thailand and Malaysia.  In the end I'm going to swing to Malaysia just for the sheer diversity of the food available here.  The Malay/Chinese/Indian combo is pretty much unbeatable and I've developed a deep, deep love for the Chinese-style seafood that you get here (and yam baskets).

If I was going to narrow it down to a single place, I'd probably even bypass Penang and go for Kuching - the area is home to dozens of family-run seafood restaurants which aren't much to look at but they have some the freshest and tastiest seafood I've ever encountered (this is coming from someone who spent four years in Scotland guzzling the world's finest oysters - I love my seafood.)  More sophisticated options are also in abundance, if you ever happen by there an evening spent at Bla, bla, bla is totally worth it.

More favorites in the next installment.

Back to Borneo

We made our first trip to Sarawak nearly two years ago and now we're going back . . . with my parents in-tow (they'll do fine, really).

To get everyone prepared for our journey, I have been re-reading and insisting that everyone else read Redmond O'Hanlon's book, Into the Heart of Borneo.  This is one of my all time favourite non-fiction books and is essential reading for armchair adventurers and hardened travellers alike.

Redmond, his poet-sidekick James Fenton and their three charming and resourceful Iban guides all set off on an incredible adventure deep into the jungle in search of the Bornean rhinoceros. Pumped full of tuak (native rice wine), arak (a lethally strong rice brandy), hoards of sticky rice and boney river fish they have many (mis)adventures - particularly with the local wildlife, which includes:

• 166 species of snakes: including 2 species or python, 50 venomous snakes including, aggressive sea snakes which have been known to swarm in the thousands, three kinds of cobra, pit vipers and river snakes.  Let's also not forget the flying tree snakes.
• leeches: giant leeches, up to two feet long and tiny leeches that live in rivers and streams only as wide as a thread that patiently wait for you to drink them down so they can feast on you internally.
• mosquitoes. Enough said.

Less scary native species include the elusive clouded leopard, cranky sun bear, big-eyed tarsiers, tiny slow loris, agile gibbons (they can swing from branch to branch for distances of up to 50 ft at speeds up to 35 mph), mighty orang-utans and countless species of birds including the revered hornbill.

Although parts of Borneo are now as developed as anywhere else in Malaysia, deep in the jungle there are still unruly natives prowling about with lethal blowpipes and who were reportedly head-hunters up until the 1960s. Despite ever-increasing development and the devastating destruction of huge swathes of primary rainforest for ever-expanding oil palm plantations, Borneo still possess a slightly wild edge.  It's not New Guinea, but it sure ain't a tourist-packed Thai island either.

We won't be hitting the jungle quite so hard as Redmond and James, but we have every intention of spotting a few orang-utans, visiting a Dayak longhouse, squeezing in a few jungle treks of our own, relaxing on the beach (hopefully without sea snakes!) and no vacation would be complete (especially with Thomas Galli) without a few beverages.  I can't wait to be back in Borneo.

Super sweet-tooth

When people ask me what I like most about living in Malaysia,  I have two answers ready: the weather and the food.

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The weather bit is pretty self-explanatory, what's not to like about a year-round tropical climate where you only need a wardrobe for one season and can spend every weekend lounging poolside or go to the beach on a whim?

Now not everyone would enjoy the food as much as we do - particularly if you have an aversion to spicy food (or fried stuff).  The food in Malaysia is much like the people - diverse.  It's an amazing blend of Chinese, South Indian and Malay cuisines - everything from deep-fried yam baskets stuffed with chili chicken to banana leaf curries to rich, spicy coconut-based soups full of ginger and lemongrass.

My preferences for Malaysian food definitely reside with the spicy, savoury stuff - but Malaysians are quite famous for having a bit of a sweet tooth and their deserts range from the bizarre to the truly disgusting.

Let me start by saying these people love sugar.  Love. They put it - in vast quantities - in everything.  Breads, juice, coffee, tea, even batter for frying. The sugar craze is so out of control that there are actual public service announcements telling people to limit the amount of sugar they put in their tea.  I've even heard that there are restrictions on how much sugar one can buy in a single trip to the supermarket.

Just yesterday, we went for a Sunday stroll in the park which was brimming with all sorts of vendors selling cold drinks, chips, popsicles and in once instance, what was quite literally an ice cream sandwich - a hot dog bun filled with three scoops of ice cream.

It gets worse.  Another common dish is a tropical fruit salad that has a dressing comprised of sugar, peanuts, chili and  . . . . shrimp paste.

Creamed sweet corn and red beans are also frequently featured as a topping for desserts like cendol (chen-dole) which is essentially shaved ice with coconut milk and these slimy, green worm-like noodles made from rice flour and pandan.

A lot of what I find so off-putting about Asian deserts is that they lack the sweet/savory distinction that is so  prevalent in Western cuisine - there is also often an issue of texture, I think the photo says it all.

I'm not a remotely fussy eater - and frequently blindly put myself into the hands of my Malaysian friends and trust that they aren't going to feed me anything that will kill me - but I drawn the line at slimy desserts. 

There's plenty of scary savoury stuff out there too, I was chatting to a colleague from Spain the other day who said, 'I quit eating wildlife after some tribesmen fed me monitor lizard.'  We all have our tipping point.

Dirty laundry

We have the luxury of having a laundry service in our condo and as a result I never have to iron anything.  Brilliant, right?

Well, we recently got some new ironing ladies. (I don't know what happened to the old ones, but they were very good).  The new ones are both painfully slow and don't do a very good job.  And much like their predecessors the new staff do not speak any English, but what does it matter?  It's not an act that requires a great deal of communication.

I picked up some shirts the other day and as usual the receipt was taped in some bizarre place, just waiting for Ian to set off with a piece of paper fluttering from his wrist or shoulder.  To save him this embarrassment I pulled off the tag and without even looking at it handed it to him to put in the bin.

I then heard a peel of laughter and Ian handed me back the receipt:

Orang Putih translates literally as 'white man.'  So just imagine if you went to the dry cleaners and picked up your laundry and it said 'white man' or 'black man' or 'latino man.' (For the record our previous ironing ladies just wrote our condo number on the receipt.)

At least they didn't write 'Mat Salleh' which is a more derogatory term used to describe white people - which roughly translates as 'mad drunken sailor' and has it origins in describing the bad behaviour of sailors on shore leave in Borneo in the colonial era.

This incident is so typically Malaysian.

Malaysia is often thought of (and frequently is) a pretty racist place.  Throw together a healthy mix of Malays, Indians and Chinese (and as a result Muslims, Hindus and Buddhists with a sprinkling of Christians) not to mention a healthy aboriginal and expat population and you at once have a truly wonderful cultural and ethnic diversity but also a recipe for much conflict and strife. 

Malaysia does certainly not rank high on the politically correct scale (ahem, see exhibit A above) - and sometimes I think that's a virtue, it's an easy thing to overdo.

Anyway, we got a good laugh out of it.  My Malaysian friends and colleagues also got a kick out of it (but only after I assured them that we were not offended - then they too thought it was hilarious.)

Travels to the South Pacific

Well Ramadan is into full swing which means I'm in a country of cranky, dehydrated, hungry people who should all be banned from driving until it's over.  Therefore, it seems the perfect time to go on vacation and leave the circus behind.  Also, I have a few visitors currently en route.  One visitor is a cousin whose journey will originate in Galesburg, this is what she is in for:

• a 3 hour, 180 mile drive from Galesburg to Chicago, 
• a 3.5 hour flight, and 1750 miles to Los Angeles, 
• overnight in LA, 
• a 6,500 mile journey - and 12 hour 40 minute flight to Shanghai
• followed by a layover in Shanghai 
• a 5 hour 2,700 mile flight from Shanghai to KL
• and finally a 45 minute - 30 mile drive from the airport home

That's 11,160 miles and roughly 21 hours of flying alone - roughly three days door-to-door, she also will cross the international date line and lose a day of her life. Suffice it to say there is no easy way to get here.

Surviving that, I think they've probably earned a trip to the beach.  So we are off to Pulau Tioman an island off the east coast of Malaysia, which would be familiar to many as the filming site of Bali Hai for the classic 1958 film South Pacific.  We will enjoy three days of snorkeling and taking in the crystal clear waters of the South China Sea.  I'm hoping that will have made the journey worth it!

Seeing Singapore

Nearly two years in Malaysia and we have finally made our first trip to Singapore.  Singapore as we know it was established as a British trading post in 1819 by Stamford Raffles (for whom everything in the country is now named).  After years of British rule it was occupied by the Japanese in WWII - then went back to the Brits before it became part of an independent Malaysia in 1963.

 The union with Malaysia was a short, unhappy marriage.  Singapore was a wealthy city, lacking natural resources with an ethnic Chinese majority - the rest of Malaysia was Muslim-Malay dominated, significantly poorer but rich in natural resources - within two years Singapore was expelled from Malaysia and became an independent state.  Despite a relatively peaceful co-existence today the rivalry between Malaysian and Singapore remains palpable.

Although Malaysia has developed rapidly and is now at the top-end of second-world country status, Singapore and Malaysia are still complete opposites - where Singapore is clean, orderly and expensive - Malaysia is dirty, chaotic and cheap.

I wasn't overly-charmed with Singapore - don't get me wrong, the ability to safely cross the street, the lack of garbage, extreme regard for health and safety and the general efficiency of well, everything, was refreshing - but beyond that it's just like any other modern, first-world city.  I can see why the Brits enjoy it, they love to tour their former colonial stomping grounds and to European eyes Singapore is something completely different - but skyscrapers are less impressive to Americans; we have some pretty good ones at home.

 Also, having been to so many other Asian countries and cities, Singapore just feels like someone came in and cleaned it up for the tourists.  It lacks a certain sense of authenticity and it should be no surprise that Singapore does feel so 'unauthentic' - of over 5 million inhabitants only 3.25 are citizens - the other nearly 2 million people are foreign permanent residents and workers.

Despite great affluence (Singapore has the 3rd highest per capita income in the world) Singapore has a dark side.  Chewing gum is famously banned and canings for relatively petty crimes make the news regularly as do Singapore's draconian anti-drugs laws - but the lives poor migrant workers are particularly grim.

As of May of this year nine Indonesian maids had fallen to their death in Singapore (some accidental, some under investigation).  There are frequent stories of beatings, sexual abuse and even murder (last year the body of maid was found stuffed in the water-tank of a condomimium which was also contaminating the water supply) and only from 2013 will maids legally be required to be given one day a week off work.

I complain about Malaysia (sometimes a lot) but given a choice between the two, I'd still probably stick with Malaysia - but it's certainly nice to have Singapore just 200 miles down the road.  If you ask a Malaysian what do you think of Singapore they will say, 'Oh, it's so stressful! So organised and so many rules!' If you ask a longtime expat in Malaysia what they think of Singapore they say, 'Oh, it's so relaxing!  It's so organised and everyone follows the rules!'

Moving to Malaysia

I'm pleased to announce that this blog will now also be featured on the online edition of my hometown newspaper the Register-Mail. So in hopeful anticipation of an increased readership, now seems as good a time as any for a quick recap on how and why I ended up in Malaysia.

After suffering five long years of cold and rain in Scotland and England my husband (then fiance), was offered a job as an Assistant Professor of Psychology at the University of Nottingham (yes, that Nottingham - Robin Hood, Sherwood Forest etc.) Only the job offer (mercifully) was not in Nottingham, England but at the university's Malaysia Campus.

Yes, Malaysia.  That long, skinny country dangling off the edge of Asian continent right below Thailand.

Up for an adventure and a rather dramatic change of scenery we snapped up the opportunity and in six short weeks found ourselves on the 13 hour flight from London to Kuala Lumpur.  Woefully unprepared for life just 200 miles north of the equator (one doesn't require a lot of hot weather clothing in the UK) we stumbled into the stifling tropical heat and humidity and so our adventure began.

Despite the fact that virtually everyone speaks at least some level of passable English here (particularly in the city), finding a place to live, organising an internet connection, buying a car and most importantly of all  - making sure the air-conditioning works were all 'interesting' experiences.   Experiences that brought out the best and worst in both of us - countless lessons in patience and communication whilst simultaneously reinforcing our sub-conscious prejudices and pre-conceptions.

Mark Twain once said:

'Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts. Broad, wholesome, charitable views of men and things cannot be acquired by vegetating in one little corner of the earth all one’s lifetime.'

As always, Mr Twain was undoubtedly correct, but sometimes I wonder if living in a place just can't tip the balance back in favor of narrow-mindedness.

It's now been nearly two years since we came to Malaysia and with the exception of a few near total meltdowns (almost always involving some totally egregious native driving stunt)  and our fair share of food poisoning we've had a pretty good time.

In the last 20 months we've seen wild orang-utans in Borneo, been to a week-long Indian wedding, stood on the edge of a volcano in Java, scaled ancient temples in Cambodia and much more.

With so much happening in this part of the world and so much to do and see, we are nowhere near ready to say goodbye just yet (although, we certainly do miss good cheese and affordable wine!)

So to see what we've been up to, take a look through the archive of our travels and stay tuned for more - I'm currently in the midst of wrapping up on our recent Indonesia adventure and Singapore is up next.

I always welcome comments, questions, thoughts and suggestions.

Island time: Langkawi

Shortly after our return from Laos, we were blessed with another four day weekend so it seemed appropriate to get ourselves to Malaysia's most famous island destination: Langkawi.

30 km off the west coast of Malaysia and right at the border with Thailand, Langkawi was formerly an outpost for pirates and smugglers; today it is a full-fledged vacation destination. It's one of those places so disconnected from the real world that it's difficult to imagine that anyone is actually from there.

Beach bunnies

Langkawi is positively saturated with tourist amenities - five star resorts to hostels, upscale restaurants to messy food courts. And even though there is continuous development along the main beaches, it mercifully lacks those imposing concrete tower-block monstrosities that have ruined so many fine beaches around the world. The biggest eyesore is the fleets of jet skis that are dragged out in the morning and left to bake in the sun all day for tourists willing to pay $50 for 20 minutes of noisy fun.

Actually, the jet skis are the second biggest eyesore. The first is, without question, the hordes of Europeans (mostly Germans, French and Italians - in that order) who think Speedos look good and that there isn't an expiration date (or weight limit) on when one can wear a bikini.

On the upside, this did trigger a tiny spark of national pride. Americans are frequently classed as slobby, heathens - a stereotype I don't strictly deny - but I bet I saw more Speedos in those 4 days than are owned in the entire male population of the United States of America. America 1 - Europe 0.

Fortunately, most people don't find their way off the main beaches and there are a few wonderfully deserted beaches a short drive away where you can virtually have the place to yourself.

Hidden in that clump of trees is the exclusive Four Seasons Resort and if you get too close a tiny Malay man appears to chase you away. Keeping a safe distance, we nearly had the place to ourselves and set up camp right on the line of demarcation and enjoyed the view.
A jellyfish got me on my thigh and I had a lovely stinging welt for a few days, but it seemed a fair price to pay.

Vertigo

As Langkawi is one of those self-styled holiday destinations it has all sorts of bizarre one-off attractions (crocodile farm, rice museum) - the crown jewel of these establishments is the cable car and skybridge.

The cable car is the steepest in the world - it's not like the ones in the Alps that gently follow the incline of the mountain so you never feel quite as high up as you actually are - this thing is more or less vertical, fast and nearly a kilometer long. I don't have any photos that accurately reflect how terrifying it is - this is because my eyes were closed and I forbade Ian from making any sudden movements. This is the best we could do:

The only thing that got me on board was that the girl at ticket counter promised me it was only ten minutes to the top (which is true) and I discovered that the cable car was actually Austrian-made, that made me feel better until I realized it probably didn't come with several Austrian engineers to run and maintain it. Too late.

We made it, but I was so jittery I could hardly enjoy the spectacular views and I had to save my rapidly dwindling reserves of courage for the skybridge (and the trip back down). The skybridge is 700 meters above sea level, a bit rusty, the planks are made of wobbly concrete and it does gently sway and bounce.

Ian strode out like it was no big deal (show-off). I stayed on what I had illogically and arbitrarily deemed the 'safe bit' and distracted myself playing with the camera. In the end, this is as far as I made it, fake smile and gripping the rail for dear life (as if it would make a difference!)

The return ride was as traumatic as going up, safely back on land we sought out cocktails and headed home the next day. Our bumpy descent through the clouds as we were preparing to land in KL gave me flashbacks.

It's a jungle out there

'Marissa, Marissa wake up! It's time to go see the elephants!' No joke, that was Ian at 7:00 am sharp this morning.

So off to the elephants we went.  An hour and half drive deep into the jungle, with the last 12km or so down a two-lane road dotted with shacks and traditional Malay homes, we arrived.  Ian couldn't keep the grin off his little face.

Kuala Gandah Elephant Sanctuary

The sanctuary was a fair bit more sophisticated than I expected.  Lots of information about the elephants, a cafe, plenty of toilets and shower and lovely grounds.  Lousy gift shop though, it consisted of tacky tee-shirts and a few souvenir coffee mugs that said 'save the elephants' - done in permanent marker.  No one knows how to make a buck like the Americans.

I digress.  We followed the sounds of elephants trumpeting away and soon armed with peanuts, were able to feed the babies.

We got well and truly covered in elephant snot, but it was fun anyway.  We then had some time to kill before the fun really got started, which is when we got to ride the elephants and then join them in the river at bath time. (I'm pleased to say that on a subsequent visit they had eliminated the rides, which are bad for the elephants and have improved the bathing process significantly so that it is far less stressful for them.)

So we had a great day and learned a lot.  The Asian Elephant is an endangered species due to deforestation and urbanization - although in Malaysia that is called 'forest conversion'.  Most of this 'conversion' is the result of palm oil plantations - which destroy the elephant habitats. The elephants then take to raiding plantations, costing farmers lots of money.  Herds also get split up or trapped in small parcels of land often surrounded by plantation or other obstructions.

Malaysia gets really defensive about palm oil and (perhaps fairly) think it's a bit rich for the US and European countries to be lecturing about environmental policy.

The entire west coast of Malaysia from Penang to Johor is pretty much one giant oil palm plantation. It's heart-breaking. The problem with palm oil is not just simple the deforestation, it's the destruction of primary rainforest, that will never grow back. Oil palms grow very quickly, but they also have a relatively short life cycle, so once they are no longer productive, plantations are abandoned and the land is good for little else other than building on.

While Malaysia is pretty naughty, it pales in comparison to Indonesia - and Malaysia likes to remind you of that any chance they get. 

Back to the elephants. Kuala Gandah looks after 'displaced' elephants not only from Malaysia, but Thailand, Burma and around Southeast Asia.  Some are re-released others remain at the sanctuary.  The sanctuary is remarkably uncritical of the plantations and farmers.  Whether it is because they count on their cooperation to be notified of raiding elephants or they simply just view it as an essential part of Malaysia's development plan, it's hard to tell. 

Either way, they are certainly getting part of the equation right (and it's a great day out). We left what we thought was a fairly generous donation and will certainly be taking visitors there.

So, the whole dvd/cd debacle isn't quite so tragic as it may seem.  It is the only way to get Ian to part with these:

Unfortunately, the dvd's are already packed, but suffice it to say, I'm thrilled that Starship Troopers is staying behind.

I've also been studying up on the basics about Malaysia.

1. Malaysia has a population of about 28 million and covers an area just larger than New Mexico.
2. The average life expectancy is 73 for men and 76 for women (the US is 76 and 81)
3. The ethnic breakdown looks something like this: Malay 50.4%, Chinese 23.7%, indigenous 11%, Indian 7.1%, others 7.8%
4. Roughly 60% of the population is Muslim and there are separate laws that apply only to them (ie no booze) but are enforeced to varying degrees in different regions.
5. There are Sharia Courts for Family and Civil cases (if you so choose) but choose carefully as if you don't like that decision you are unable to appeal through the 'regular' court system.

Okay, must pack.