Back to Borneo

We made our first trip to Sarawak nearly two years ago and now we're going back . . . with my parents in-tow (they'll do fine, really).

To get everyone prepared for our journey, I have been re-reading and insisting that everyone else read Redmond O'Hanlon's book, Into the Heart of Borneo.  This is one of my all time favourite non-fiction books and is essential reading for armchair adventurers and hardened travellers alike.

Redmond, his poet-sidekick James Fenton and their three charming and resourceful Iban guides all set off on an incredible adventure deep into the jungle in search of the Bornean rhinoceros. Pumped full of tuak (native rice wine), arak (a lethally strong rice brandy), hoards of sticky rice and boney river fish they have many (mis)adventures - particularly with the local wildlife, which includes:

• 166 species of snakes: including 2 species or python, 50 venomous snakes including, aggressive sea snakes which have been known to swarm in the thousands, three kinds of cobra, pit vipers and river snakes.  Let's also not forget the flying tree snakes.
• leeches: giant leeches, up to two feet long and tiny leeches that live in rivers and streams only as wide as a thread that patiently wait for you to drink them down so they can feast on you internally.
• mosquitoes. Enough said.

Less scary native species include the elusive clouded leopard, cranky sun bear, big-eyed tarsiers, tiny slow loris, agile gibbons (they can swing from branch to branch for distances of up to 50 ft at speeds up to 35 mph), mighty orang-utans and countless species of birds including the revered hornbill.

Although parts of Borneo are now as developed as anywhere else in Malaysia, deep in the jungle there are still unruly natives prowling about with lethal blowpipes and who were reportedly head-hunters up until the 1960s. Despite ever-increasing development and the devastating destruction of huge swathes of primary rainforest for ever-expanding oil palm plantations, Borneo still possess a slightly wild edge.  It's not New Guinea, but it sure ain't a tourist-packed Thai island either.

We won't be hitting the jungle quite so hard as Redmond and James, but we have every intention of spotting a few orang-utans, visiting a Dayak longhouse, squeezing in a few jungle treks of our own, relaxing on the beach (hopefully without sea snakes!) and no vacation would be complete (especially with Thomas Galli) without a few beverages.  I can't wait to be back in Borneo.

Back to Indochina: Laos

A bit of background

Before returning to the back-catalogue of tales from India, our week in Laos has gone all too quickly and here we are home once again. Needless to say we had an amazing trip and Laos is possibly the most laid-back country on the planet. As anticipated it is very much like Cambodia, but without the hassle (backpackers excluded!)

Both Cambodia and Laos are categorized by the UN with 'Least Developed Country' status. They share similar infant mortality rates (between 55-60 deaths per 1000 births - the ratio in the US is 6:1000). The average life expectancy for both countries weighs in around 60. They have similar literacy rates at just over 72% and most children attend school for 9-10 years. Both countries rank appallingly in the world-wide corruption index (Laos comes in at 154 of 183, Cambodia at 164). Both were French colonies, and it shows, baguettes and cafe culture abound.

On the ground Cambodia appears to be the more developed of the two. In general there is better infrastructure, better roads (not good roads, just better roads), a small, but noticeable middle-class (as well as a small outrageously wealthy elite) and the greatest test of all in Asian development - the presence of Kentucky Fried Chicken. However, that is where Cambodia's edge ends (if you can count KFC as having an edge).

Most strikingly of all, Laos does not appear to be suffering from any of the child protection issues that are the scourge of Cambodia. I could count on one hand the number of begging children encountered in Laos (in Cambodia there were hundreds). There is no evidence of rampant padeophilia (by Westerners), child neglect or abandonment.

In fact, homelessness across the board appeared to be virtually nonexistent as was any evidence of starvation. There is also virtually no harassment and pestering. You are allowed to wander the market without items being shoved in your face, tuk-tuk drivers don't accost you relentlessly and restauranteurs don't stand on the sidewalk trying to lure you in.

Say what you will, but I suspect this culture has something to do with the fact that Laos is a Communist state and the government despite many, many serious flaws (not least that it is a one-party dictatorship in which all other political parties are banned) does manage to provide a very rudimentary social safety net. Laos also has one of the lowest unemployment rates in the world, a meager 2.5%  - ranking it 21 out of 199 putting it way ahead of Switzerland, Germany and the USA.

The Lao government also began encouraging private enterprise in 1986 and since then (with a brief blip from the Asia economic crisis in the late 90s) the Lao economy has grown by more than 6% each year. It is Laos' goal to graduate from Least Developed Country Status by 2020 and they appear to be on track to do so. The Chinese, as in Cambodia, are also on the scene - they are currently spending a whopping $7 billion (USD) to kit out Laos with a high-speed rail linking Vientiane with the Chinese border.

Onto the journey

Well, I'm not going to lie, our journey didn't get off to the greatest start. As if I don't hate flying enough, getting up at 3:00am for 7:45am flight is even worse. Add to that trying to get Ian up and it's like lining cats up for a parade. Anyway, we made it to the airport in plenty of time, had a smooth 2.5 hour flight and were on the ground by 9:30am Vientiane time.

Things did not immediately improve. The Lao government has put a flat rate of $7 for the taxi ride into town. This is by all means an exorbitant sum for this part of the world, but $7 isn't exactly going to break the bank and sometimes you just roll with it. I was ready to roll, Ian was gearing up for a fight. In the end we got the taxi - needless to say, it would have been a lengthy walk into town and a tuk-tuk would have saved us no more than about $2. This did not prevent me hearing about our squandered $7 for the rest of the morning. Pointing out that we really only frittered away a couple of bucks as a tuk-tuk still would have cost money apparently did not help the situation.

We arrived at our accommodation. Now, I'm a pretty hardened traveler and have survived many nights in inferior accommodation, but this was pretty sub-par. As always my first exploration of our new digs took me straight to the bathroom. I was instantly swarmed by mosquitoes (we were to discover that even in the dry season, mosquitoes were still a pretty serious problem) and as I victoriously crushed the life out of one unfortunate skeeter against the bathroom wall, I noticed that a large portion on the bathroom wall was indeed smeared with mosquito guts and blood from previous guests whom had fought the same losing battle. Charming.

The bathroom also had that delightful scent of raw sewage that accompanies one virtually everywhere in Asia and the shower curtain was positively streaked with slimy black mold. Too tired and dirty to care, I hopped in the shower while Ian plugged up gaps in the windows and fans with plastic bags to keep the infestation down and we set off in search of food.

Still bristling from our massive over-expenditure on our taxi fare, we made several aborted attempts to get some food, no way was Ian going to let breakfast set us back another $7! We (I) did eventually locate a small noodle shop, crammed with locals and commanded we stop. We ordered two steaming bowls of Pho and were richly rewarded. We topped up our soups with a dazzling array of condiments: fish sauce, limes, sugar, soy, pickled chillies and no less than two kinds of amazing (super hot) chilli paste. Washed, fed and on the ground holiday could officially begin.

Christmas Island

I have to say that in spite of all the decorations and making Ian crazy with the Nutcracker on repeat in the weeks and days leading up to Christmas, that hot weather at the holidays is just plain weird. I kept trying to reassure myself of the novelty of it all and how I couldn't wait to rub it in to everyone back home that I'd been for a nice long swim in my pool on Christmas day, but the festive feeling was, until the very last minute, lacking entirely. Fortunately, there's nothing like a bottle of white wine at 11:30am and a few gifts to kick things into gear and suddenly it was Christmas.

I get ahead of myself. Taking advantage of Ian's family visit we set off for Pangkor. Pangkor is a small island about halfway between KL & Penang, and despite having heard fairly positive things about it, I was withholding judgement as to how it would rate as a beach destination particularly given its location in the high-traffic and murky waters of the Straits of Malacca.

We arrived well after dark and the first thing that struck me (aside from the carnation pink people-carrier taxis that are driven with wild abandon over the hills and around the curves of the island interior) was a genuinely alarming lack of Chinese people. Now, we've been in Malaysia for exactly 14 months and that is long enough to learn that, where there are Chinese there is beer and no Chinese people = no beer. This would certainly be a sorry way to start off a trip to the beach.

My suspicions were confirmed when there was only one place in the entire village with beer and I do not exaggerate when I say that every, single white person in town was there. Normally, I would avoid this type of place like the plague but it was agreed all-round that after a 6 hour journey involving a long car ride, noisy ferry and high-speed suspension-less taxi ride that the availability of beer trumped all. We had a thoroughly mediocre meal, enjoyed a few ice cold Tigers, took a quick turn about the town, called it a night and prayed for sunshine the following day.

Our prayers were answered, we awoke to a lovely sunny day and afraid that it might end at any moment grabbed our gear and set out for the beach. In a moment of blind excitement we foolishly attempted to cut off a corner of the walk by cutting through a patch of jungle rather than follow the road. We were instantly swarmed, and I mean swarmed, by mosquitoes and quickly came upon a troop of cheeky macaques, we promptly abandoned the trek, located the beach and made for the lovely, clear warm water letting the salt assuage our recently acquired battle scars.


Although limited in cultural exploits, Pangkor does have more to offer in terms of wildlife than macaques and mosquitoes and (with the aid of our fancy new camera lens) we saw our first hornbills in the wild. I'm sure we were also surrounded by any number of poisonous deadly snakes and the sea bed was riddled with exceptionally large slimy sea slugs and spikey sea urchins.

We returned to KL to commence our holiday celebrations. Ian did (finally) get me that beautiful porcelain Chinese lamp - and even condescended to spend an extra $30 on the lampshade. We had a delicious dinner of rosemary encrusted pork loin with with mustard cream sauce, braised leeks and mashed potato - it had nothing on Grandma's prime rib, but it certainly did the trick. Boxing Day we went to Trader's for drinks where (as usual) the service was terrible and the drinks overpriced, but the view is unbeatable.

BYOB

Apologies for the gap between updates, but really I've had very little of interest to report.  I've been pulling 10 hour work days sitting in front of a computer, so as a result nothing interesting has been happening to me and I don't really want to look at a computer screen when I get home.

Anyway, as I type Ian is currently tinkering with our plumbing.  I went to wash the dishes yesterday and this is what came out of our tap:

It's been 48 hours and this is still going on.  I suspect this is a result of the heavy, heavy rain we received over the weekend.  It poured. Now one of the very few things Malaysia regularly gets right is sewage and drainage - mostly due to the constant threat of malaria and dengue fever - so when several roads wash out and your plumbing is screwed it probably rained pretty hard.

All I can say is thank goodness it's cheap to eat out and don't be expect to be invited round ours for drinks anytime too soon.

In other news travel plans for a trip to India in June are in full swing.  A very dear friend is getting married, so we're off to Madras for a 5-day South-Indian wedding and then I've got nearly two weeks travelling around with my French-Canadian sidekick who previously survived two weeks in Morocco with me.

Otherwise we are off to Borneo at the end of next week and our anti-malarial regimen beings on Friday.  Orangutans, snorkeling and drinks with tiny umbrellas in them, here I come.

Happy New Year, round 2

It's been a busy first week back.  Getting past the jet lag, undoing Ian's little messes and getting my act together to face my first full week of work in the office.  As for work, I'm nervous, scared but mostly really excited to get back into a proper routine and engage my brain on a regular basis.  Housewifery is just not for me.  Paychecks will be pretty cool too.


Yesterday we spent shopping and successfully acquired a sprinkling of new things that will go a long way towards filling this empty shell of a condo.  We found and ordered a fancy new coffee table (teak of course), downside being that we have to wait a month for it.  We've also reached a compromise on a bed (alleluia!), found a sofa, picked up a few more kitchen utensils and finally got some smoke detectors!  Hoping for a less hectic (and less expensive) day today.  Hopefully the somewhat elusive sun will pop out for a few hours allowing me a few hours poolside to retrieve my tan that abandoned me in the States. 

The weather has felt distinctly cooler since I've returned - which here means the low 80s.  It has also been England-grey and a bit on the rainy side.  The mosquitoes have been persistent as ever.  I counted 24 bites yesterday, I'm sure the number is higher today.  Citronella and all other supposed natural deterrents are an absolute myth - I'm coming round to the idea that I may just have to walk around in a cloud of DEET 24/7.

Malaysia is rapidly gearing up for Chinese New Year (Feb. 3), the year of the rabbit.  Red lanterns abound and little Chinese markets selling all sorts of plants and trinkets, presumably our equivalents of poinsettias and Christmas ornaments, have sprung up all over the place.  Best of all, Chinese New Year seems to mean that beer goes on sale - $30 for a 26 can 'prosperity pack' of Tiger. 

Home Sweet Home

Having spent the last week traversing 3 continents and traveling over 10,500 miles it feels very good to be home (however you want to define it).  Most of all, it feels good to not have a suitcase constantly trailing behind me. It was a mixed trip back, sad as always to leave Chicago but I did manage not one but 2 jaunts into London, getting the chance to potter around the city a bit and catch up with friends.

London to KL was pure misery.  Two hours late departing Heathrow pretty much wiped out my connection time in Abu Dhabi.  I got off the plane at 2:36 am and my next flight departed at 2:50 am.  Miraculously, I somehow made it from the rear of the plane, through security, to the complete other end of the airport (the next to last gate) and onto the plane as they were announcing final, final call.  Credit to Etihad Airways, my luggage even made the connection - I am still grateful and totally impressed.  (I was however at one point certain that I had actually sprinted to my death.  Abu Dhabi to KL was without the question the bumpiest ride I have ever experienced in my long history of flying - not those gentle bumps you can sleep through, the kind where your stomach feels like it's dropped down to your feet.  We bumped along like this for the last 2 hours of the flight, there were sighs of relief and a round of applause when we landed).

I arrived home to a not-quite-tidy flat that Ian has semi-reverted into a bachelor-pad - no toilet paper but copies of Wired magazine littering the bathroom floor and literally no food.  His reign is over.  He did however redeem himself slightly in that in my absence he managed to acquire some decent wine glasses, two floor lamps and his newfound pride and joy

a lovely little lime tree that set us back a mere $9.00!

I too (after stateside trips to Target, Crate & Barrel and Williams Sonoma) returned with a sprinkling of items that make this place look slightly more inhabited including new bathmats, table cloths, placemats and other kitchen implements.  More importantly I returned with a big bottle of gin (thanks mom and Thomas).  We also have our first visitors, a quick shout-out to Nick and Michelle here from Bristol who kindly treated us to banana-leaf curry and a round of beers last night.

I've been back just over 24 hours and asleep for a good deal of it, but have already acquired a fresh sprinkling of mosquito bites.  It's good to be home.

The Lizard King

Well our little lizard has stuck with us and a good little lizard he is.  As far as I can tell he has been very respectful of boundaries.  He seems to stay in the living room sticking the the ceiling and walls and hiding out behind light fixtures and pictures.  He seems to come out mostly at night or when we aren't home - we occassionally see him scampering away as we come in the front door.  Mostly I am pleased that he seems to stick to the living room.  Little as he is, I think he would give me a bit of a scare if I found him in the bath or clinging to the shower curtain or worse on my pillow or something.

More than anything I am to the point where I will welcome with open arms anything that helps keep the mosquitoes under control, I'd quite happily have a dozen little lizards.  I have a stockpiled an arsenal of spray, citronella candles, and coils to get rid of the little buzzing bastards.  I keep the windows closed as much as is practical without having to run the AC full blast all day everyday and spray myself every 5-6 hours. Regardless, I reckon I'm still sustaining 1-3 bites a day and walking around with at least 6 bites at any one time.  One actually got me inside my nose this morning. 

We are probably going to go bankrupt on anti-mosquito contraptions but I suppose that is the price you pay for living in the tropics.  I think a mosquito net for the bedroom may become a necessity in the not too distant future.  We're off up north to Penang this weekend where I'm sure there will be plenty of mosquitoes lying in wait for me.  Beyond that, I'm homeward bound a week today via Dubai and London and just dare any mosquito to follow and survive that journey, if that doesn't do it, I'm sure the Chicago cold will.

Also, I've decided our lizard is worthy of a name. Suggestions?