It finally happened.

So this finally happened. Emergency landing a plane over a couple bits of plastic and a cup of water seems a bit extreme to me (and the only people I really feel sorry for are the delayed fellow passengers of the offenders). I've written previously about how unreasonable people are when it comes to spending a few hours in the air and don't expect anything to change short of a mandatory dose of Ativan for all passengers before take-off.

I'm sure you'll be surprised to know that I have a strong opinion about the Knee Defender. I think it should be banned outright (and on most airlines it is). Most of us know what we are getting into when we fly and I think the Knee Defender is pathetically passive-aggressive and downright selfish.

I would also like to know why tall people get the monopoly on flight discomfort? I'm not particularly tall or large - I'm pretty much exactly average, so I accept that certain aspects of flying are more comfortable for me than others. But. I do get bad lower back pain - particularly when I stand or sit in the same place for long periods of time. On long-haul flights (and I do a lot of 8+ hour flights) I need to put my seat back just as much as the 6'4 guy behind me needs more leg room.

I think I'm a pretty conscientious flyer; I tend not to put my seat back on short-haul flights and I always put my seat up for meal service - but I do firmly believe that should I choose, the right to recline my seat is irrefutably included in the price of my ticket. From a purely logical stand-point, it is difficult to argue that an action that actively interferes with the design of someone else's seat trumps that of a person using their own seat as it was designed.

I'm not going to suggest that tall people either don't fly at all or fly business class; flying is frequently the only way to get from A to B and if flying business class was affordable, we'd all be doing it. I guess what I am trying to say is, can't we all keep our hands (and seats) to ourselves, have a drink and be miserable together?

Travels to the South Pacific

Well Ramadan is into full swing which means I'm in a country of cranky, dehydrated, hungry people who should all be banned from driving until it's over.  Therefore, it seems the perfect time to go on vacation and leave the circus behind.  Also, I have a few visitors currently en route.  One visitor is a cousin whose journey will originate in Galesburg, this is what she is in for:

• a 3 hour, 180 mile drive from Galesburg to Chicago, 
• a 3.5 hour flight, and 1750 miles to Los Angeles, 
• overnight in LA, 
• a 6,500 mile journey - and 12 hour 40 minute flight to Shanghai
• followed by a layover in Shanghai 
• a 5 hour 2,700 mile flight from Shanghai to KL
• and finally a 45 minute - 30 mile drive from the airport home

That's 11,160 miles and roughly 21 hours of flying alone - roughly three days door-to-door, she also will cross the international date line and lose a day of her life. Suffice it to say there is no easy way to get here.

Surviving that, I think they've probably earned a trip to the beach.  So we are off to Pulau Tioman an island off the east coast of Malaysia, which would be familiar to many as the filming site of Bali Hai for the classic 1958 film South Pacific.  We will enjoy three days of snorkeling and taking in the crystal clear waters of the South China Sea.  I'm hoping that will have made the journey worth it!

Flying high

I've lived in four countries on four continents, been to dozens of countries around the world and all across America.  All that travel adds up to a lot of time spent in airplanes.  I'm going to let you in on a little secret, I'm terrified of flying.  Terrified.

Flying is, without question, my least favourite activity in the world.  Not only is it uncomfortable and inconvenient, it's just plain unnatural.  Cruising through the sky at 38,000 feet? Give me a break, I'm not supposed to be up there.

I know precisely how ridiculous this fear is - flying is the safest form of travel, etc. etc. Yes, I know.  Terrorism doesn't scare me particularly - but cracked wings, high-altitude stalls, frozen temperature gauges - these are the things that lead to sleepless nights even before the shortest of flights.

Before moving to Asia the vast majority of my flying experience was between the UK and US and inter-European flights. I've crossed the North Atlantic dozens of times and until moving to the tropics I took for granted just what a smooth, turbulent-free route that generally is. 

Hot weather and tropical storm systems make for extremely turbulent flights in this part of the world.  I've now crossed the Bay of Bengal nine times since moving to Malaysia and every single time it has been a stressful, hair-raising experience.  Travelling east over the Bay of Bengal is particularly bad.  In the roughly three hours you spend over the water a solid one and a half hours of it is heavy turbulence - not gentle shaking, but turbulence that feels like a carnival ride, you can actually feel the plane losing altitude and your stomach dropping right along with it.

I'm pretty sure each of these crossings has taken years off my life.

I was giving a talk about travel to a group of seventh graders last year, and a student asked me what my scariest travel experience has ever been - all I could come up with was crossing the Bay of Bengal. 

I run a strict Airbus and Boeing policy, I won't set my big toe on any other make of plane - the same day we flew back from Indonesia in May (on an Airbus) another plane in Indonesia - a brand new Russian plane crashed into the side of a mountain killing everyone on board. When there is a crash or major incident I fret and obsess over it for days.  The Air France crash from a few years ago still lingers.

Aside from severe turbulence and a couple of ropey landings in storms, I've never experienced anything approaching an aviation disaster.  I do however know several people who have had flights re-routed or performed an emergency landing due to cracked windscreens or a loss of cabin pressure - I figure it's only a matter of time before it happens to me!

I've had a nice break from flying recently, I haven't been on a plane since May, but that will end in just a few short weeks when I'm off to Thailand.  My anxiety is already rising- but so long as the  anticipation and excitement of visiting a new place can exceed my anxiety, I'll manage.

I've also made it clear to my husband, that when we pack up and move back west for good - we're either taking the trans-Siberian railway or driving (yes, I'd probably rather drive through Pakistan than get on a plane given the choice!)

And speaking of exciting cross-continental land journeys, we currently have a student who is riding a 110cc motorbike through 21 countries from Malaysia to the UK as charity ride for the Red Cross - last we heard he'd made it as far as Bangkok - you can follow his blog at http://www.goingnotts.com/  or if you're feeling generous you can donate to a good kid working for a good cause: https://www.justgiving.com/goingnotts.

For those you accessing this blog through the Register-Mail you can read more about my past exploits and adventures at www.wherecanigetadrink.blogspot.com. 

I welcome comments, questions, ideas and suggestions about this and future blog posts.

We made it!

We commenced our journey from Heathrow about 36 hours ago on one of these

I've flown on plenty of big planes in my day, but this was my first experience with A380 superjumbo jet.  It has a capacity of 555 and being seated in the last (88th) row it took well over half an hour to get off (even with 2 exits).  In general, I am of the opinion the bigger the better when it comes to aircraft but Quantas has grounded its entire fleet of A380s at the moment after an engine failure and emergency landing in Singapore the other day . . . so between that and the time it takes to disembark, I was pretty happy to go back to a trusty Boeing 777 for the Dubai - KL leg of the journey.

Otherwise it was an uneventful journey.  We arrived under cloudy but dry skies and it was a blamy 82 degrees.  We were greeted by Flora, the nanny and all-round PA for Ian's boss.  She makes a mean Singapore Sling.

Peter took us for dim sum and beer in Chinatown and we returned full of delicious food and happily exhausted.  Getting ready for some proper exploration of KL later today.  Peter and Rika are off to Thailand for holiday on Thursday and leaving us with their flat, car and even Flora to give us a hand and cook and keep us well-watered with a steady supply of cocktails.  I think I can just about get used to this.